A Bro Comes

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[KARI can't talk, but she mumbles and subtitles are under it]

[LARRY also can't talk, but mumbles like KARI]

[HVFA can't talk normal like Kari/Larry]

[Harry is also like Kari/Larry/HVFA]

[Surge is like Kari/Larry/Harry/HVFA]

[Surge is a dinosaur]

[still beeping]

Surge: Hello. Remember me?

Clay: What? No. Who are you?

Surge: I was talking to Sergeant.

Sergeant: [gasp] It's you!

Surge: That's right. I'm-

Sergeant: No, not you. I had this song stuck in my head about this warlock who kills everyone. I couldn't remember the lines though, because none of it really rhymes.

Surge: Oh, I love that- up buh buh ub buh buh buh! Don't change the subject. Do you know who I am?

Sergeant: Yes. It all started a long, long time ago... [screen says "FLASHBACK NOT AVAILIBLE"] [beeping stops] ...I was in the library. I was reading a book about werewolves, when ironically, a warlock sat down in front of me, and I had a song stuck in my head that was just like that. Anyway, all of the sudden he stabbed me, and I was screaming like a banshee. [yells "LIKE A BANSHEE!!!!" twice] [everyone "shh"-es]. I knew that it meant war, because the warlock was reading a dictionary. But, I knew that I could not win, so I planned a very elaborate and unnecessary escape plan. Unfortunately, I farted during it, and so chicken came and threw invisible car mechanics at me. [screen returns to normal] [beeping resumes] And that's where babies come from.

Surge: What? No, I'm your brother. What was all that? I mean-

[explosion] [beeping stops]

Clay: Whoa. Good thing I went to get water guns from the dollar store.

Kari: Wait. That's were you were? You should have went to the ninety-nine cent store.

Clay: No, we all agreed not to go there because they wouldn't let us use our coupons to buy the cashiers.

Kari: That's doesn't matter, we need to see if everyone's okay.

Clay: Don't you change the subject!

[Harry sits up]

Harry: I'm okay!

Kari: Why are you even still here?

[Sergeant sits up]

Sergeant: Whew. I managed to shield myself with the other guy.

[Surge sits up]

Surge: I'm Surge, your brother.

[Sergeant punches Surge]

[Larry sits up]

Larry: I'm not okay! I lost my moustache!

Kari: You never had a moustache.

Larry: Not now I don't!

Humphrey: Nap time over!

HVFA: I'm back! Yes! Ew. Why are my pants wet? Aw, man I missed the bomb! Can you at least tell me about it?

Sergeant: It was very explosion-y!

HVFA: Wait a minute. Who are you?

Surge: I'm yours now. Not even my brother knows who I am. [walks over to HVFA]

Sergeant: Wait! Don't go! You never even told us who you are!

HVFA: What part of it was the most explosion-y?

Harry: The explosion!

HVFA Did you have any idea it was a bomb?

Sergeant: From the beginning.

HVFA: Are you lying? I made it specifically sound like this goblin song or something.

Sergeant: We noticed. And it's not a goblin, it's a warlock.

HVFA: One more thing. Do you have any pants I could borrow?

Harry: Sorry, I just took the last pair.

HVFA: Thanks anyway. So, I'll go conquer this dimension. Come on black squadron. Come on white squadron. I'll be sure to write!

Sergeant: Bye! Have fun!

Clay: He's not gonna write.

Sergeant: I know. But I'll always hope that other one who left us will. We know nothing about him.

Clay: Yeah.

Sergeant: We've lost 2 men now. Maybe we should pre-order one.

Kari: Oh no. You-You don't mean-

Sergeant: I'm sorry Kari. But you have to learn to face your fears sometime.

Clay: I hate ordering people. The lady is so ugly. And she has a messed-up speech chip and sounds like...

Ordering Lady: Well, hello Kari. My daughter. Whom I'm the mother of. Also mother of that good-for-nothing-son. He better not be hiding from me. Honestly, why didn't I ever think twice about him? I mean-

Sergeant: Uh, we're here to replace a captured soldier.

OL: Fine. Who?

Sergeant: [whispering] go on Clay.

Clay: [whispering] I'm not doing it.

OL: Who would you like to replace.

Clay: [whispering] Where's Harry?

Harry: God she's ugly.

OL: Excuse me?

Clay: [whispering] Geez, doesn't that thing have a volume control?

Harry: No.

OL: I'm leaving.

Sergeant: Wait! It's about Humphrey!

OL: Wha-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-at?

Harry: I feel like puking!

Sergeant: Shut up, okay?

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